4 weeks

Three weeks, actually, until I'm done with school
Oh man.
I think I just panicked.

Four weeks until Christmas time.
Three weeks until Finals week.

Yikes.
See you in Four weeks!

Melancholic Me.

Just as I suspected. :P

Which of the Humours are you?

You are Melancholy. Melancholics are often gifted, even prone to genius. You are deep and thoughtful, but this can lead to your being too introspective, to the point of moodiness and depression when you find flaws within your self. You strive for perfection in all things, most especially your self and your immediate world. You are sensitive to the needs of others, and loyal to your friends, but can be hard to please. Melancholics do well in the Arts, science, and math.
Take this quiz!








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I broke my camera!

Thanksgiving Day morning, I broke it good.

Considering that I had to put my precious 14 month old cat to sleep the Thanksgiving prior, I got off easy.

But now I need a new camera. I could get this one fixed, too.
Actually, that's a swell idea. But I have a weird feeling that it would cost more than an equivalent new camera would cost me...

I'll take it around and get an estimate if I can. It's just the (what's that thingy on the front called?) lens part which won't telescope properly, it's a bit jammed up.

That is all.

Wasting away

I've been on this mission lately, tracking every thing I eat and trying to keep that mission (fairly unsuccessfully) from becoming an obsession. I've lost three lbs this week and before you congratulate me, I'm actually pretty freaked out about that. Three lbs a week is normal for the first and second weeks of a new weight loss effort, but the third week? That makes me nervous. Partly because it's not very safe for me personally (I can get all kinds of weird around this, it's happened before), partly because there's no guarantee I'm not losing muscle or even bone.

I'm taking a new medication which lists weight loss as a prominent side effect, and seeing as I'm getting random finger and toe tingling (another cool one), the rapid weight loss could be part of it. I'm just not understanding how eating three meals out yesterday (okay, dinner *was* only half a milk shake, not a proper dinner at all) could result in such a loss over three short days.

The other thing that comes with this drug is increased risk of osteoporosis, which has gotten me eating more calcium, in some sort of effort to prevent it from leeching too much from my blood. Who knows.

It's just that I don't want to let my desire to wear my awesome cute smaller summer clothes trump my knowledge of health and nutrition, and considering that my stupid nurse practitioner (the one who prescribed me these pills of doom/joy) was confident that her story of a patient of hers who lost 30 lbs in a month on the drug was "motivational", I'm not sure where I'll go if I do have a concern. My new and awesome Physician's Assistant, I guess.

So far I've been doing this for 23 days and lost 11 lbs. That should taper off ANYTIME now. Maybe Thanksgiving weekend will slow me down a bit. I just don't wanna lose all of my cuddly charm. No one would like that, most of all, me.

The new year approaches

Okay, check it:

I am not a big fan of "the holiday season". In fact, in my head, I tend to think of it as "the dreaded holiday season". That may seem weird. Because things related to Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years are very pleasing to me.

Can I not eat me some pumpkin and pecan pies? Why yes I can. Do I not adore the nog of egg or the wass of ail? Why yes, I do. Is wrapping a pile full of artfully selected gifts not a singular joy? Why I rather think it is.

Was I not rocking the far too early Christmas tunes on the radio this past Friday as I cooked dinner? Did I not catch myself singing a Christmas carol just this morning as I cleaned the kitchen? Yes, constant reader, and yes.

But the whole: "OMG YAY WE'RE SO HAPPY AND PRESENTS ZOMG!!!! YAY!!!!"?

No.

I hate seeing my family and all of my friends (such as they are) are busy and everyone goes out of town. This year old man Schuck and I have some Hell Raising planned though, as long as his Baby Mamma and my Baby Daddy don't renege on their baby parenting duties.

Seriously, I'm looking forward to obsessive exercise, drinking to excess, and reviewing 18 chapters of Spanish so I don't feel like a fish out of water when I get to Spanish 4 in January. Wow, vacation never sounded so good, did it?

Something funny?

I've got nothing to write about (and less to read as Palmer seems to have lost his muse over at Fearful Symmetries). Lately I've been relaxing into the rhythms of life (which is no mean feat for me), and working out.

Right now I've got a living room floor full of clean laundry. It had to move there because piled up on my bed, it prevented my going to sleep last night. The Netflix films I've had for 2+ weeks are just sitting there on top of the TV. I guess I wasn't ready to rewatch Children of Men after all. I thought perhaps I'd watch it this morning. But it's gonna be another beautiful and unseasonably warm day (52 in mid-November in Wisconsin!?!?), so spending the morning inside seems criminal.

Here's something funny. I'm nearly ready to start looking for a job. "Nearly Ready" means: I no longer get hives thinking about going to an office day after day. [oh, wait, writing that sentence gave me hives. perhaps I spoke too soon?]

My last exam in Anthro made me realize I've begun to catch up with myself. Actually, surpassed myself, intellectually. It's like my brains aren't any better than they were a few years ago but I've figured out how to USE them. That's a good thing. Still aimless as ever, but I seem to be able to hear and then use information well.

In the next few minutes I will be deciding what the next couple of hours will hold. My deepest yearning is to lay in bed and drink water. I'm not kidding. That sounds so wonderful to me. Hey, that's kind of funny (not intentionally so, but hey I'll take it)! There, I did it.

Cow

From the Cows on the Concourse 2006 - I wonder where all the cows are now?

Also, why didn't I really take any pictures in 2007? At least I've started up again.

If you can read this, you are a genius!

Look for the Union Label

I come from a long line of Union folks, so it's heartening to see a picket line in the news (organized labour is so passe these days!) - here's a video from United Hollywood showing office writers/cast members talking about the strike.

A hot bath

The weather has turned cold, and I'm saving up for something good so I haven't yet turned on my heat. The apartment is a surprising 70 degrees, which I'm happy about, considering it's 34 with a 27 degree wind chill outside.

I remain adamant about not being quite ready for the weather.

The one nice thing the cold brings back are long hot soaks in the tub, which is where I'm headed momentarily. I'm hoping the hot water will have a soporific effect and I'll be able to sleep closer to 8 hours (my favourite amount of sleep is 9 hours a night, but I haven't pulled that off in a long time) than I have in the past couple of weeks.

UPDATE: I got nearly 7 hours! Maybe I can do it again tonight...

Because I care

Okay, so I went to look up the telephone number of Walgreens so my poor asthmatic kid can get an inhaler refill, when I notice there is a "Sexual Wellness" tab and of course, I must click on it.

And following some interesting sounding links (come on, "STDs and Ecological Niches"? That is a must click), I get to this CRAZY image.



It is somehow deeply disturbing, I think you will agree. But wait, there's more. Here is the text:

Many sexually-transmitted diseases (STDs) invade the host and reside for long periods of time without killing the host. A good example is syphilis, which may reside in its host for 30 to 50 years. HIV also can take 10 or more years to kill its host, allowing plenty of time to spread the infection.

But really I'm super fascinated that Walgreens will ship a Liberator Wedge or some De La Cruz Super Macho High Potency Formula with Bovine Glandular Concentrate Capsules straight to my home.

It's all so wholesome seeming, but seedy at the same time.

I was born to blog/Talk to me/Thank you for being a friend

For reals, tho'. I've been a self-involved diarist since I learned how to hide a notebook. When I started blogging I felt so incredibly anonymous, it was great. In this forum I'm known to a few and that's fine. Most of the time I keep my business out of it.

Lately I have begun to see that I have a talent of sorts, and that is getting people to tell me things about themselves. It only works with people I'm actually interested in hearing about, and is strangely ineffective on Palmer. He can resist my verbal charms like no one else on the planet. At least he isn't immune to *all* of my charms.

Today I had a nice conversation with one of my professors and I left feeling as I hope others feel after we talk. As though a burden were lifted from my shoulders, as though someone understood my situation. And that was really nice. I'm not all that good of a counselor, and not always that good of a listener, but I am rediscovering the curative powers of a good conversation.

Later on I had a brief but moving conversation with a woman in my class. She looked really sad and I walked up to her and hugged her (I didn't even ask her permission, and we are not friends in class, but she looked so lost). Then she told me something really sad, her reason for looking so devastated, and I hugged her again, and this time she grabbed me back and held on. I wanted to sit next to her and just hold her. In hind sight I kind of wish I had. She was really hurting.

Apparently my misanthropy isn't as hardcore as I'd thought.

Although I can't recommend that everyone hug people without permission (I can get away with it sometimes for reasons I am hoping are not related to my becoming 'matronly'), I do encourage the offering of a heartfelt condolence to someone who looks sad.

And although it is very difficult to do sometimes, I also offer a recommendation to take the kindness offered freely by others, especially when you need it.

It's not often I get to quote the Spice Girls Movie, but it's true, "a smile costs nothing."

The past couple of weeks have been odd - I'm not sure what it is, but I've been connecting with people as I haven't felt able to in a long time. It is fantastic, but I'm afraid I'm going to overwhelm everyone with my enthusiasm. Ah, the more things change, the more they stay the same.